The Starving Playwright

Have you ever had a huge school project, or a paper, or something that you were assigned by someone, that you had to do, and get done, and you tried and tried to do something good, but you hated your own work, and you went a day without working on it, and you felt so guilty, and you had the worst case of writer’s block ever, and you absolutely didn’t know what to do with the piece of junk in the first place?

Well, I have, and it’s not even schoolwork. Allow me to tell you about it.

If you’re one of my followers on Tumblr (which right now is only my friend MaKaylah, actually, and I don’t even think she’s reading this), then you might already know about this, but my youth group and I do this talent show every year, and we usually do a human video, but this year, we decided we’d rather do a play. I’m the only person who’s big on writing in my youth group, that I know of, and I also volunteered my services, so I’ve been selected by my pastor to write a play. Now, this is my first time trying to write a play, or at least, more than three or four pages of a play, and so I really have no idea how this is going to go. I got the official assignment last Sunday, and my youth pastor has very high expectations. He wants it to be humorous, but also tug at the heartstrings, and to have a theme of resurrection, and to feature true stories of the struggles of kids in the youth group, and alos to maybe have some songs and dances…It seems like he thinks I’m an amalgamation of Stephen Sondheim, Rodgers and Hammerstein, and Shakespeare, which, for the record, I’m not.

So far, I’ve written two whole scenes, and I’m working on the third one. I have maybe the worst case of writer’s block that I’ve ever had in my life, and I keep reading it and thinking, “Oh, this is so cheesy,” and “Oh my gosh, none of the kids are going to want to act in this,” and things like that. Allow me to state the obvious and say that writing is hard. Also, writing a play is much more difficult than I had expected. I suppose it comes naturally to some, but I’m more used to writing in basic prose, or in epistolary form. However, I do enjoy the challenge, and like I said in my last post, I do have a great story idea that I think would work better in the form of a play than in a novel… I suppose I’ll consider this as preparation for the future.

Oh, and I’ve forgotten to mention that I read The Hobbit shortly before Christmas break ended, and so, I’ve begun the semester with 125 extra credit points in my Lewis/Tolkien seminar. I was very disappointed in three aspects of the ending…cough…if all you Thorin/Fili/Kili fans get what I mean… L

Jessie and Kili forever!  Or, if you’re a Twitter addict, who doesn’t mind using hashtags outside of Twitter, #jessieandkiliforever.

 ~ Jess ~

A Family Drama

It seems like the past couple of weeks have been full of drama, in all sides of my family. I won’t go into details, but there’s been a lot going on in my little family, and I have to say, I think we’re all handling it pretty well. Every family goes through their own troubles at some point, and right now, we’re having our fair share of them.

Do you know what this makes me want to do? It makes me want to write.

There’s plenty of good, classic family dramas out there- take The Glass Menagerie. There’s also even more modern examples, movies and such. It’s a common genre, really, but that’s because there is an audience for it. It’s such a relatable topic, and it’s one that sounds like tons of fun to write.

Yes, in case you were wondering, this is how I deal with the things that go on in my life. I turn them into words. Ever since I was young, I’ve written in various forms, going through phases with writing journals, novels, and poetry. It’s just so therapeutic for me- it helps me to view the events in my life in a more objective way, and it helps me stop looking at what I perceive as “unfairness,” and look more at the big picture. Even now, here I am, still writing novels and poems, and blogging. This is how I cope with my struggles, and how I sort things out, and so, this is what I do. Writing clears my head.

So here I am, writing after a botched attempt at a nap, still working on this blog that I figured I would have dropped by now.  Well, I guess it’s a good thing that I haven’t dropped it- it’s turning out to be quite beneficial for me, whether anyone actually reads it or not.

Back to the topic of family dramas, I’ve had this little idea rolling around in my head for a while now. This is not necessarily something that I would want to write in novel format, but there is a NaNoWriMo-esque thing in April called “Script Frenzy” where you have to write 100 pages of scripted material in a month, and whenever I think about this idea that I’ve had, it seems to lend itself more to a movie, or perhaps a play...more on the idea itself later. I’ve got to go write down the details before I forget them!

Love, Jess

Giving Back This Year (Important Things)

Happy (slightly belated) New Year's, guys! Let's break out the sparkling grape juice and the confetti!

So, one might wonder what I've been doing since my last blog post. If I had any readers, they might ask, "So, Jess, what have you been doing since you posted last?" Well, my answer would honestly be, "Nothing of consequence." I've been playing silly games like Fruit Ninja, Subway Surfers, and things like that on my new Kindle Fire, spending the night over with friends, and doing crazy nonsense. At my friend Cathy's house, I literally stayed up for 40 hours straight. We went bowling for her birthday (yes, because we're the cool kids), then we came home and had a dance party, and stayed up all night watching movies. I finally saw (500) Days of Summer, which was great, because how often do you see Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Matthew Gray Gubler in the same movie? Never. And they're beautiful. I watched the first half-hour of Ted, and was bored to tears, then watched Pitch Perfect, which I was expecting to be like Glee, but it was actually pretty neat. Then, since I'm a diehard Tyler Perry fan, I watched Why Did I Get Married? and one of my old favorites, Daddy's Little Girls. 

That's all fun, but in the grand scheme of things, it's not life-changing. I want to do something that will really positively affect someone. That's why tonight, when my youth pastor mentioned going on a mission trip this year, instead of our usual beach conference, I was so excited. He called it to a vote, and all the kids that were speaking up seemed really excited about helping others, so I thought that the vote would be next to unanimous. However, half the group apparently voted for the beach trip. All they want to do is go hit on people and get a tan.

I don't usually blurt things out in the middle of church, but tonight, I couldn't help myself. My pastor and the rest of the leadership, as well as most of the older kids, who actually get that things aren't all about them, were clearly upset, and so was I.

"Excuse me," I declared, "but I just have something I want to say to the kids that are voting for the beach trip."

My pastor looked at me hesitantly- like I said, this kind of thing is unusual for me. "Ummm, sure. Go ahead, Jess."

"I'm not trying to be mean, but how lazy, and how selfish can ya'll be?" I demanded. Yes, I said "y'all." Most of the time, I don't have a Southern accent, but my "angry elf," as I call it, came out, and when I get mad about things, I turn into some weird hybrid of Madea and Jessie the Cowgirl. I don't remember what else I said, but I was really telling off some of these kids. Most of them looked appalled, but a few of the older, less shy kids looked proud of me.

My pastor fought a grin, let out an "oooooh," like I had just slapped someone in the face, and otherwise went on like nothing had happened. Most of the other kids didn't say anything about it later, but one girl, who just left children's church, came up to me, and apparently just had to say something, even though the vote was anonymous, and I wouldn't have known which way she voted if she hadn't said anything.

"I'm not selfish," she blurted out, "I'm just not ready for that." And with that, she ran off.

See, the mission trips we're looking at are difficult jobs. More than likely, wherever we end up going, we'll be building houses for the less fortunate. Yes, we'll be working out butts off, with few of the modern luxuries that we are used to, but still. I respect this girl for speaking up, but she just proved my point. That's the problem right there. It shouldn't be about when we're "ready." You think any of these people living in abject poverty were "ready" for their misfortunes? No. Are you kidding? Forget being "ready." This girl is 11 or 12, and has more expensive clothes than I do. I'm not saying anything bad about her, but really, this is how people raise their children nowadays? If you're not "ready" to give back to your fellow man, especially after all that you've been blessed with, you really need to check yourself.

And that was my little rant. Here, let me plug my favorite made-up charity, the Gorgeous Actor Fund. These men were the highlights of my movie marathon at Cathy's house, and we should give them all money because they're cute.

Say hello to the amazing Joseph Gordon-Levitt, star of such films as Inception, Premium Rush, Looper, and (500) Days of Summer.

Next, we have the fantastic Matthew Gray Gubler, regularly featured as Dr. Spencer Reid on Criminal Minds. Yummy.

Lastly, Idris Elba, star of Tyler Perry's Daddy's Little Girls, who's also been in other films, but you sure see a lot of his biceps in Daddy's Little Girls. He's also British, which adds like 50 hotness points.

Well, that's enough eye candy for one night. Remember, think about other people. Like these three.
~Love, Jess